It’s a Friday!!! *imaginary dance* Pardon me but it’s been a long week and I don’t think we get the same excitement for Fridays like we did before Covid-19.
How is your mental state, relationship with God and your finances? It’s a new month and I encourage you to always do a routine checkup.
So I don’t know if you’ve heard but African bloggers are busy killing it in an amazing challenge called WinterABC. The stories are so amazing and I’m loving every one of them, for some I can relate one way or the other. Same topic, different beautiful stories to read and share. Don’t say I didn’t tell you. I’m proud to be a part of the journey too, enjoying every minute of it. *Tap on the shoulder for taking chances*
Today I get to be your teacher and I’m excited to impart some of my knowledge. Teachers are heroes because dealing with different characters in a class of hundreds is a special task of its on. (Send them air hugs)
Have you ever had an honest conversation with friends, parents, work colleagues or strangers about life in their 20s? Have you heard or read the phrase “30 is not the new 20”? Assuming you paused and answered each question let me start our class.
Becoming a young adult is one thing I admired as a child but only for the good stuff, I mean an amazing 9 to 5, cute apartment, occasional meet ups with the girls , flourishing relationship with God and my man….you name it, I thought it. The minute I got to adulthood I wanted out because whatever was happening is not what I signed up for.
This bring us to lesson uno (one in Spanish) Forgetting about identity crisis and getting identity capital: These are just fancy terms but the point here is finding something that defines who you are or might want to be or better yet finding out what you don’t want to be. If you’ve been struggling to find your purpose in life or trying to understand who you are and have failed miserably….have you considered finding out what does not work for you be it at work, in your business, friend and relationships and other aspects of your life. Your identity is from being more self-aware, letting go of personal or family norms, holding onto principles that vibe with you and letting go of others. What better time to do that than in your 20s?
Don’t get me wrong, you can do this at any time of your life but if you are just starting out on this roller-coaster called Y/A (Young adult) I believe you have the will power to know who you are and use that to your advantage. So write that list cross whatever shouldn’t be on it and get closer to your true self. Identity crisis is not knowing who you want to be or simply not having your life together and beating yourself up about it. Paul Angone calls finding out what we don’t want to do a game of Emerging Adult Elimination.
Lesson dos (two) resonates with each one us, don’t deny it. It’s normal but today i’d like for us to stop it or slowly grow out of it.
Comparing yourself to others. Continuous comparison produces unwanted feelings which lead to depression, anxiety and jealousy which are uncalled for. A behavior most common in your twenties and earlier years. Your 20s are a time to flourish with all the fresh creativity, energy and peace. As should be with all your years on earth.
Here are few of numerous ways you could cure comparison.
Cut back on TV and the internet (Linda you must be joking) No, i’m not, I know we have to stay informed but I mean stay away from the pages, channels or sites that make your mind race to places that will kill your track progress.
Celebrate what you do because nobody will do it better for you. Whether it’s big or small, celebrate and stop obsessing about everything you don’t do. It’s okay to be inspired by others but don’t let their light dim yours, I love to believe different personalities is what makes the world interesting. *Imagine we were all the same*
I’d also like to add that being intentional helps with curing comparison. Once you know how meaningful life is you’ll be selective with your time and guard it from the time thief comparison is.
I’m obsessed with making the most of our 20s because so many people will tell you how you have your whole life ahead of you. What about we forget that and say “My point of power is in the present moment”. Be it your studies, work, relationships, finances, lifestyle, etc. The time we waste sulking over what should have been can be used to improve what is already existing. Stop comparing yourself to others and start pursuing what is meaningful to you.
Thank you for coming to my class and I hope we can have another session together.
What teacher would I be if I didn’t leave you with homework? Are you in your 20s, or are you in your 30s and would like to mentor young adults, or do you love to read regardless of age?
I recommend you read 101 Secrets for Your Twenties by Paul Angone and The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter- and How to Make the Most of Them Now by Meg Jay. This class couldn’t have happened if I hadn’t stumbled on those amazing books. So read them and share your findings with the world. Meg Jay has a Ted talk that can also be helpful. The good teacher added a direct link to the Ted talk. Tap her name above and jump right into it
That’s all folks, love and light. Have a lovely weekend.